A “very generous” letter left on the Resolute Desk in the Oval Office
Here it is, Trump’s letter to President Biden. Did the ex-president turn a new leaf on his way out the door? Did Trump really write Biden a “very generous” letter? You be the judge:
Hey, Joe —
You didn’t get here fairly but I guess you got me. I’m not done yet, but for time being, my office is yours.
By now you may have already begun your work to set America backwards by inviting China to steal our jobs, let the country be overrun with brown rapists, and raising taxes. You have already said you are rejoining the disastrous Climate Accord — did you notice that snow flurries are predicted for noon today?
Although I am alot smarter than you, I am going to stand back and stand by. I hope you won’t ruin everything I’ve singlehandedly done for America.
I know you claim to be a religious person. God told me — and you can check this with Franklin Graham — that you should pardon me, Ivanka, Don, Jr., and Eric. If you believe in God, you will do this, perhaps waiting until after we all get indicted. God also told me that you should find a way to extend the pardons to state prosecutions. Take my word for it, Article II of the Constitution lets you do anything you want.
And I just saw on Fox that you are going to take down my picture of Andy Jackson. Why? He was a good man, a great man, maybe the greatest president other than me— he cleaned out the Indians in several states and taught his contemporaries how to treat slaves. His slaves loved him. Did you know he had 150?
In any case, good luck to you. Either me, Ivanka, Don, Jr. or one of the rest of us will see you in the 2024 campaign.
Sincerely as I can be,
Donald J. Trump, (Still really President of America and Commander-in-Chief)
Please, dear reader, appreciate that this piece is satire. The real letter left by the Orange Menace was no doubt not quite as “generous” as this one.
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